Birthday Boxes

My daughter celebrated her birthday this week along with several of my yoga students. Of course her favorite part is the gift opening. Birthdays are so special to kids and we all love to open packages with a surprise inside, but after I became a mother I have to say that now my favorite part of celebrations is watching a child-especially my own- open a gift.

Here is one way you can incorporate birthday celebrations and social skills into a children's yoga class a traditional learning environment or even in the home.

A while back, I found a colorful birthday gift box (pictured at left) in the Dollar Store and bought it originally to put a gift in, but the box was too small for the gift I had gotten. Rather than throw it out, I have turned it into my special "Birthday Wish Box".

In this activity I have the children sit in a circle. Each child then gets a turn to 'put' birthday wishes inside the box either by saying them into the box or by writing them on slips of paper and placing them inside. (This activity works best for children 6 or older.)

Each child is encouraged to look at the birthday child as they are doing this and to speak clearly and slowly. (Sometimes they need help with prompts.)  The birthday child is encouraged to do the same and look at the person talking to them. Everyone uses their listening skills, letting one person talk at a time, and remembers their manners with a "Thank You" after each wish is given. The 'gifts' and sentiments are thoughtful, heartfelt and sincere, even among supposed 'enemies'.  Both the givers and the receiver feel valued, cared for and special. The positive atmosphere carries throughout the whole day.

At the end, the birthday child has a turn: a wish for themselves and a wish for their friends.

This idea can be adapted so many ways. You can use an ordinary box with a bow on it-and it does not have to be a "Birthday Box. It can be a " Positive Wish" box or a "Friendship Box" & be used instead by children to give positive reinforcement to each other. Select a "student of the week" and Have the children write something they like about that student on a slip of paper and place in the box during the week. You can also do this as a circle time activity with each child speaking into the box.

It can also be used at home among family members, especially for those who are on extremely tight schedules or who has a parent who travels for business a lot.

I also saw this concept used with a Tibetan Bowl, (pictured at right) and have used this technique as well.  Use this in the same manner as the box only with the bowl let each child hold the bowl as shown, and as they wish, strike the bowl to make it ring, sending "good vibrations" to the birthday child. (This has come to be known as the "Birthday Bowl" and the kids ask for it when they know a classmate's birthday is coming!)

*What are some ways that you make your students feel valued and special?

*What are some ways you encourage positive reinforcement among peers, especially those who don't get along?


We would love to hear your ideas! Please leave a comment below!
 
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Cat Pose: Holding on and Letting Go

A few weeks ago as I was coming in from an early morning walk I heard a rapid, barely audible 'meow, meow' coming from my basement window well.  When I went over to peek down I saw a tiny black kitten had fallen down into the well and could not seem to get out.

As I reached down to lift him out, he quieted immediately and started to shiver and shrink away from me. He did not appear to be hurt, so I guessed he was either scared or cold as it had been a chilly night and I had no idea how long he had been down in there.

I took him inside, wrapped him in a towel and warmed him up. He never purred nor made a sound, he just lay there, a bit calmer now, letting me hold him and scratch his ears, surrendering to the moment. I sat outside with him as it warmed up hoping the mother, with a collar and tags (with an address) would come looking for him, but she did not. I went and asked the neighbors if they lost a kitten and none of them had. After several hours, now attached to this beautiful creature, I  reluctantly decided to take him to a local animal hospital to see if they could find him a permanent home. (I cannot have pets due to my lease agreement.)

When I brought him into the waiting room, he suddenly came back to life, climbing out of the towel, up onto my shoulder looking around. I took him to the receptionists counter & he climbed right out of my arms & onto the desk. He purred and meowed and sniffed and everyone fell in love with him. I left feeling confident that this was the right decision and he would find the perfect family. I named him "Midnight".

All the way home and ever since then, I cannot not help but think of how life is a series of experiences-of moments- requiring and sometimes challenging us to either 'hold on' or 'let go'. Sometimes we hold on to people, memories and things for far too long, and other times we let go of them far too quickly. It requires inner calm, emotional maturity and our full attention to know when we should do which. Each time we let go of something we no longer need, we make room for something else in our life. Every time we hold on to those things we no longer need, whether things or anger, painful memories or relationships that no longer serves us, we block ourselves from experiencing life the way we truly envision it for ourselves: Peaceful, loving, happy and fun. Its a lesson we all will learn either by choice or by force.

In my own practice, I think 'Cat Pose' illustrates this:  Alternating between stretching the spine up and releasing it down towards the ground deliberately along with the movement of breath encourages us to release physical and emotional stress and pay attention to what we are doing, thinking and holding on to. It shows us through our body, that is absolutely OK for us to 'release'. For this reason it has always been one of my favorite postures to do at the end of the day.

For kids, its a fairly easy posture to *practice, and to adapt, either on all 4s on the floor, seated on the floor, exercise ball, in a chair or even a wheel chair. Cat Pose helps release tension in the spine and shoulders (where many of us 'hold on' to physical/emotional/mental tension) and helps to stimulate digestion, elimination and other functions of the internal organs. It also improves posture and improves concentration. Most children find it fun to 'meow' or 'purr' and will tell stories of their own cats or other pets which encourages interaction, verbal expression, communication & other social skills. 'Purring' or 'meowing' releases tension in the vocal chords. (Encourage them to meow or purr loudly and then softly, etc.) Most children find it very calming and will ask to do more of Cat Pose. (It also falls in with the upcoming holiday theme of Halloween.)

It also is something common that they can all relate to & provides a non-threatening way to teach about adjusting to transitions: holding on and letting go.

A mantra or 'chant' can be added with the movement & breath for children who are old enough and when its appropriate: "Don't hold on-Let it Go" or simply "Hold on-Let go".

Sensory aspects addressed are proprioception, interoception, balance, auditory and tactile ( practicing on different surfaces: mats, carpet, furry area rug, etc.)

Some simple illustrations for Cat Pose are below. Remember to encourage children to move slowly, and to breathe (exhale as you round the spine up or backward and inhale as you move the belly button down toward the ground or forward.) The can do this with a 'meow' or a 'purr' to encourage them to take a full breath and release it. Its best to practice on an empty stomach and allow the children to hydrate with plenty of water after exercising, (and throughout the day) even if only moving around a little bit.

Please check with a doctor or therapist to be sure that the posture is safe for the child to practice. (For example, Cat Pose would not be practiced if a child had a rod or pins in the spine for some reason. If you are ever in doubt always ask a professional.)

Keep in mind that for children the postures do not have to be purr-fect (I couldn't resist that one!) just as long as they are not injuring themselves or others, let them move and explore in a fun environment!

*Please supervise children at all times when practicing yoga, exercising or on exercise equipment!

For further adaptations, please contact me: barbara@bodylogique.com

To see full, illustrated instructions on how to practice "Cat Pose", visit Yoga Journal .

Cat Pose on all 4s

Seated Cat Pose (cross legged on a mat or the floor)

Seated Cat Pose (feet flat on floor seated in a chair)

*Seated Cat Pose (on exercise ball-feet flat on floor)

Bullying: Helping Kids Find Their Power

I love it when the house it quiet for that first hour in the morning after everyone leaves. Its a time when I can be with my thoughts and reconnect with my strengths, ideas & talents and find my true source of power: Me.

I practiced yoga this morning as I watched the sun rise up through my front living room window. I don't always practice in the early morning, but when I do, I notice a different kind of energy in and around me all day. Its as if I have somehow gone from average to invincible and no matter what I do or who I encounter that is difficult in the course of my day, I feel calm, in control & like I will know the right way to handle it. On the days that I don't practice at all, I can tell you that I feel powerless over my own reactions & things have a whole different outcome. I have learned over the years how to find and keep my power level where it needs to be. I am trying to show & teach my daughter this now as she navigates the complicated world of being raised by divorced parents, understanding female friendships, boy-girl relationships and other peer interactions.

When I was finished & as I was making my "To Do " list and checking my e-mail I came across this article about a Father Trying To Get Phila School To Stop the Bullying of his First Grade Son. This family came here to get away from the violence & powerlessness in their country only to find more of it here unleashed on their son. I hurt for them. It breaks my heart to think about how we take away other's and give away our own power on a daily basis.

This strikes a triple chord with me, first having been bullied in school myself, then trying my best to help my own 3 kids through it, and now working with children with special needs as I do. Teasing/bullying comes up a lot and I do my best to work with parents to help kids understand the dynamic and then have tools to combat it. Believe it or not, there are many opportunities for self-empowerment during yoga, and I use these opportunities as well as storytelling to their fullest to present scenarios for children to solve conflicts and use in real life situations.

There are no easy answers or solutions and each case if different, but the one thing in common is that in all cases someone ('victim') is willing to give away their power, (or does not know how to keep it) and another ('bully') is willing to take it (or does not know how to resist taking advantage of perceived weakness.) In all cases, both the bully and the victim suffer from a feeling of dis-empowerment.

Empowerment is defined as: increasing the spiritual, political, social, or economic strength of individuals and communities, leading to the empowered developing confidence in their own capacities and abilities.

I think the question should not be "How do we address/prevent bullying as it happens," but rather "How to we teach kids-all kids-(bullies as well as victims) to find, build, keep and take back their true power"?

Its beyond obvious that the problem is way out of control. Bullying goes on every day in schools and on playgrounds and beyond. Some of you will disagree with me, but I'm starting to understand that its ultimately not up to the schools to stop it in most cases. (In the case of the family in the story at the link above, they clearly need some help navigating the system and the school does need to address it immediately.) While the schools definitely need to address it immediately as it happens within that environment, ultimately, its up to us as parents to help our kids to end it.

 I want to clarify that I feel this should not even be an issue. We should all respect others no matter what they look like, talk like, believe or where they come from.  Every child has a right to go to school and learn without fear.  If children are failing to act appropriately in school, then we need to re-examine whether or not our messages are getting through & how we have taught them at home. Just as we want to scrutinize a teacher for a child not learning math or reading properly, we need to be willing to look at ourselves through the same lens when our children fail to act appropriately when not under our watchful eye. Its a group effort between school and home that begins at home.

Bullying is not done in plain view. Its done when no one is around therefore its not witnessed by anyone in authority and they get away with it. Teaching the victim to not fight back only empowers the bully. There is no consequence so the oppressor feels they have gotten away with it some more. They know if the victim does go to the teacher, something may or may not be done, and they now have an 'excuse' to harass them more for telling.  Its a vicious cycle.

I do not advocate nor encourage violence as a solution to problems, but the victims need to be able to fight back appropriately & successfully. We are talking about fighting back by finding power-not by using force. Teach your children & students the difference and give them effective strategies to find & use their own power to set limits and boundaries.

Teachers and administrators need to be especially vigilant if there is a special needs child or other child that is a target for bullying. Let students know on the first day of school that harassment is not tolerated. Look carefully for signs of stress and fear in your students. In my daughter's school they do a "Citizenship Check" once a week. The children are encouraged to write down (anonymously) incidents or persons of concern who are acting destructively towards themselves or others, as well as those who are helping and kind to others. In this way staff and parents are made aware of any potential problems and can intervene if necessary & encourage the proper behavior.

We need to remember children who are given excuses & allowed to get away with bad behavior (bullies) become adult bullies and have a hard time fitting in their whole lives; and children that are victims and are not taught how to effectively set boundaries have a hard time fitting in and remain victims their whole life. Both sides need help & support as far as I see it, but it has to start and end in the home and it has to start at a young age. Once they are teens it is much harder to get them back to that point of self-control.

We cannot empower bullying behavior by denying there is a problem and making excuses nor by perpetuating the 'victim mentality' to the victims & expect bullying behavior to stop. So maybe its time to look at ourselves as parents first. Ask ourselves: 'Is it possible that my child is a bully? If yes, Why is my kid bullying/ taking advantage of someone weaker? Where did they learn/why do they feel the need to do this?' Talk with your child and listen to them, but don't ever make excuses for them!

Parents, we need to make the schools aware that we want to be a partner in solving the problem & want it to be addressed swiftly on an administrative level. Then take steps to empower our own children so they are not viewed as easy targets. Help them take back their power by letting them think and handle some less traumatic situations themselves, with guidance and encouragement of course. In an effort to help & protect them, we do way too much for our kids, especially our kids with special needs. Most kids can do at least some things-and some can do many things for themselves, more than we realize. Start with daily routines & living activities. Get them active in sports, karate or outdoor hikes. The feeling of climbing over rocks, doing forms or kicking a soccer goal can instill a sense of self mastery & control over their environment and build a support network of peers that can be called upon for other situations such as bullying.

Put your own fears aside, and your need for neatness/cleanliness & let them wash dishes or make lunch for themselves. When we prevent them from participating & do too much for them and let them slack it takes away their power and makes them think and act like victims-(or bullies). Give them responsibilities, expect them to be taken seriously and let them feel self-reliant. Build on those skills & let them take pride in and feel good about doing things for themselves. If this is done consistently & correctly, and with firmness & love, it eliminates the need for the bully to take the power of one perceived as weaker and raises the esteem level of the victim to the point where they will be better equipped to handle it if faced with a bullying situation.

These simple but empowering actions will not eliminate the bullying problem completely, but it will begin to teach children about using not physical force, but true inner power. Giving children responsibility and allowing them to complete tasks themselves shows them you trust them and this will help them trust themselves more. Trusting inoneself is the beginning of true power. This will help move them towards more positive social interactions and build the self confidence they need to stop being a bully or a victim and to finally take back and keep their own power.

*What are some interventions and solutions that you have used as a teacher, parent or administrator to minimize or stop bullying? Please leave your ideas, suggestions & comments below.

Read more to understand bullying at the links below:

American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry


Edutopia: What Works In Education


Tigerman-Non Violent Superhero (Interactive Bullying Prevention Program)


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Sensory Strategies Part 1: Avoiding Halloween Overload

The fall is a very interesting time of year, especially for the senses. Right now it is a cool, wet rainy morning where I live. If I step out onto my office porch, I can smell the rain, the wet grass and the neighbor's fireplace burning. I can hear the light pitter-pat of the raindrops falling on the leaves and an occasional acorn or twig dropping on the roof of the porch. I can feel the dampness & the light cool breeze on my face and I see the many vibrant colors of the foliage starting to emerge as the trees begin their autumn metamorphosis.

When I walk in the woods the senses are heightened even more as I steady myself over rocks and uneven terrain, hear animals scampering in the woods and look through a lens to photograph the trees, lakes, rock formations & environment around me.

Most of us welcome the break from the office & computer & the opportunity to experience such a rich and diverse range of elements, however there are some that have difficulties filtering and processing all of that stimulation at the same time. That acorn falling on the roof sounds like a cannon exploding. And the smell of wet grass makes them nauseated. The animals scampering sounds more like a stampede. This is sensory processing disorder and it can be frustrating, uncomfortable and even painful to some.

For children with sensory challenges, the upcoming fall & winter holidays bring these difficulties into a different light. Halloween brings the addition of events & traditions that may escape the sensory & socially challenged child's understanding: noisy parties, scratchy (and scary) costumes, sweaty plastic or latex masks, darkness, strobe lights, things (and people)  jumping out at you,  and processed sugar overloading delicate digestive systems. If you really think about it, it can be a literal nightmare for both the child and the family who loves him.

For some families that live with these challenges on a daily basis, the idea of holiday gatherings can cause extreme stress. I will be offering some ideas, tips & strategies for the next few months to help children & families integrate & regulate the senses & enjoy the approaching holiday season with reduced stress.

For October, which is also Sensory Awareness Month, I have posted some specific Halloween tips at OUR Journey Through Autism, a site & community dedicated to finding ways to help children with autism, dyslexia and other sensory challenges to overcome obstacles and grow in health & learning. 

You can read the complete article here: Halloween: A Spooky Time for the Sensory Challenged

* Therapists, Educators & Parents: What are some other ways to help our kids during holidays & other high stimulation events? Please feel free to leave your suggestions & comments below!

Please share this article with others you know who have students or a children who are struggling with sensory challenges!

To contact Barbara e-mail: barbara@bodylogique.com


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Where the Mind, Body and Technology Meet

Those of you who know me know that I would rather be outside than anywhere else & that I am a big advocate of outdoor movement for children.

When I was a kid you couldn't pay me to stay inside. (Unless it was snowing out. I did not like the cold much and still don't.) 4 years ago, I moved myself and my daughter to an area with plenty of parks, rocks to climb, biking & hiking trails and lakes. I am surrounded by the beauty of the woods & 'out doors' is a large part of my life.  But as much as I advocate movement, sensory integration and art & nature being vital for children to learn & thrive, I want to also acknowledge that there are many places where the mind, body & technology meet and can live in harmony.

For many of us, ironically, it meets in the studio, right on the mat. How many of us who practice yoga will listen to our 'yoga music' using a portable media player instead of the sounds of nature (or silence)? The music that we play can help mentally transport us to a distant peaceful land, or to that meditative quiet place inside of ourselves that we are looking for.

I was at a wedding not long ago where in the church, hanging on the back was above the alter was not a crucifix, but a very large plasma TV. (I have to admit, being raised in a religious familiy as a child, this one messed with my head for a few days!)

Technology is everywhere-in offices, schools, yoga and even in church- and its not going away.  However, some resist change, or have had bad experiences or cannot keep up with all there is to learn & have gotten the mistaken idea that technology is a bad thing. Its not. Its the overuse and over dependancy on technology that is bad.

We hear everyday that our kids are spending way too much time on computers, internet and game devices  texting on cell phones, sending innappropriate photos of themselves to complete strangers and that they are lacking in social skills. Some will blame technology. I don't. I don't think it means technology is bad so much as we are failing our youth by not guiding them and not being vigilant enough to show them how to use it properly.

Hippocrates  said that "Everything in excess is opposed to nature." This includes yoga, technology, nature itself, and everything in between. We need to find and teach balance. We should do this by words and by example. We still need to move, create, write & to be connected with nature, but also to recognize that technology can help us-and our kids-in so many ways!  And we need to help them learn how. We cannot just give young children these electronic devices unsupervised and set them loose in the world. Its as irresponsible & dangerous as just handing them the car keys before they have passed their driver's exam.

One of my favorite uses of  technology are the iPad assistive communication programs. (See article:  Top iPad Apps for Children With Autism) We have heard so much about this great technology for so many children & families who have not been able to communicate with each other. This is just one way that technology can enhance quality of life. There are many others that are being used in classrooms, therapy centers and homes everyday. (The Wii Fit is another example of a great use for technology. It brings wellness and movement to those who may have limited access to outdoors. )

We don't need to be afraid of technology and we should not keep it from our kids entirely. What we need to do is to step up as parents and educators & teach our kids how to use it properly, safely & responsibly. Use it with them and keep an eye on how much they are using it.  Balance technology time with other pursuits: sports, music, art, outdoor, creative play, (and of course, yoga) to keep them well rounded, well educated and just well.

Read about some other great ways technology can help our kids:
How Technology Helps Students Learn


*What are some ways that technology has helped your students (or your children) learn?
 Contact Barbara: barbara@bodylogique.com

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Keeping Teens Engaged: Active vs Passive Learning

"What I hear, I Forget. What I see, I remember. What I do, I understand. " ~Confucius





One of the reasons I love teaching yoga to kids is because its dynamic. It gives them a balance between movement & down time. It gives them permission to move, engage & to re-connect with themselves-their bodies, their senses, their thoughts & feelings. It is an active learning experience. I've been able to design fun interactive movement games for the purpose of re-enforcing sensory integration & introducing these concepts of health, stress and relaxation, social and emotional learning and more.

 But the truth is, in the world we live in, kids would much rather be in front of a hand held game or some other form of electronic entertainment then listening to me sing or watch me fly like a bird, sway like a tree or walk like a bear. The older the children get, the harder it becomes to keep their attention, and when we hit the teen years, (whether you are talking about a 'neurotypical' teen or one with challenges,) you know how hard it is to get them to pay attention to much of anything non-electronic. I can feel it and I know when I've 'lost' them. I have to be over the top or in their world in some way or they won't even look at me. On average, I use about 75% of my creative (and physical) energy keeping them engaged in what we are doing, and the other 25% actually doing the activities.


I am a firm believer that movement & outdoor play is still the best way to help a child grow, engage and learn & that Yoga in the classroom is an excellent idea and one solution to a growing problem of keeping children active in the learning process.

We hear so much about 'unplugging' the kids and getting them involved in physical activity and nature and I am in full agreement with this as I have seen this to be helpful. But we can clearly see where we are going as far as electronics and technology. While encouraging health, movement & connection to nature, we still have to teach our kids how to be responsible with technology and how use it for learning and communicating in a positive way. We of course have to be realistic with our expectations and strike a balance between the outdoor and indoor worlds.

I also know that in order to educate, we have to meet a person where they are. What if 'outside' is simply not where your children or students are ?

What about a child's indoor environments such as in a classroom where they are expected to sit still for many hours each day, be quiet and passively 'absorb' information? What about the school districts, administrations or individual educators that are opposed to bringing more movement into the classroom, whether it be a budget issue, a time constraints or personal beliefs? How do we keep the attention of these students? Is there a creative way to incorporate electronics & other technology to help keep kids stay actively engaged in their own learning process as we gradually engage them with each other and the outside world?

One teacher thinks so.

  Caitlin Tucker is a High School English teacher from California who has listed some fantastic strategies for keeping her high schoolers engaged by incorporating & using the technology that they love and relate to. As much as I encourage movement and outdoor activities, I love her creative thinking for indoor learning and I think you will too. Read Caitlin's article here: "Fighting Engagement Deficit Disorder"

** What are some of your ideas to keep teens engaged, with or without technology? Please leave a comment below!







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Special Education: How labels Can Help

Photo Courtesy of: science.howstuffworks.com

We live in a world that has become very attentive and mindful of what words we use to describe people, especially when we describe children or adults with special needs. For example, we don't say "autistic child" we say "child with autism".  We say "challenged" and "differently abled". These words and phrases are an effort to not place a permanent label and therefore not put a limit the individual's abilities.

While our efforts to use more respectful, person centered speech is admirable, there are times when we would all just say it as it is as I do think there are occasions when a label can be very helpful for both the labeler and the labeled.

Some of you will object to this idea of labeling, especially since society has worked so hard to remove certain words from our vocabulary, and considering my work as a special needs  yoga  educator & as an  advocate of adapting activities for the purpose of inclusion of all children of all abilities. However, hear me out as you consider this: If it were not for the labels, I would not know how to approach and communicate and engage the children so that I can help them. I would not be able to adapt or customize programs so that all of children can participate. Children cannot learn unless we know their 'label' and therefore how to teach them.

If I don't know that a child has the label of "dyspraxia", I don't know how to break down yoga sequences or even the individual poses into smaller more manageable movements so that the child can build motor memory or planning; If I don't have the label of "non-verbal" then I don't know to use an alternative form of communication with that child.

The truth is, we label each other all the time. How many times have you referred to your boss as "type A" or your coworker as "neurotic" or your neighbor as "friendly", that woman flirting with your husband as "trashy" and the girl behind the grocery checkout as "rude" ?  These labels give us a clue into how we will approach-or avoid-a person or situation. We also label ourselves, sometimes positively, and sometimes not.

While every person is truly unique and no amount of labeling will ever be able to categorize all human beings, we need not be afraid of labels, nor do we need to eliminate them from our vocabulary all together, especially in education. In entirely removing them, we are doing these children a disservice by limiting our own ability to communicate the nature of the learner's difficulties & deficiencies more efficiently and to find better ways to approach & strategies to ultimately help them.

I came across an article written by Gavin Bollard (Life With Asperger's Blog) discussing Temple Grandin's three types of Thinkers in Autism . I think Gavin makes an excellent point  that if we know how a person thinks, then we can find the most effective methods to help that individual to learn.

I would like to see us all become more careful and responsible of how & when we use labels and of how we use and interpret the information contained on the label. We need to use that information to help-not hinder nor harm each other. A label should never be used as a crutch or an excuse to not try our best. We also need to keep in mind (and remind the kids)  that the label does not define an individual- it is only a small part of who they are and a part of the journey to becoming who they are going to be.





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